Sunday, May 23, 2010

Movies: Avatar and Everybody’s Fine

Redbox struck again as I was outvoted and sat through two movies I had no desire to see in the first place. The good news was that my hunch on both movies was validated. The bad news is Redbox is so cheap that I see no way of avoiding having to watch bad movies again in the future.

First up, Avatar.

angry_smurf_2

I had low expectations going in and due to that, it was better than I expected. It was action packed but the whole thing made me feel like I was watching a video game on the laptop. It was a lot like Tron with Smurfs. I never really figured how miners ended up with an inter-galactic attack squadron in 2154 when they can’t even get decent wages and a safe work environment in 2010 but I guess we’re not supposed to dwell on that.

I do see that there are all kinds of political overtones in this. Maybe the miners are BP and the Na'vi are the people living on coastal Louisiana – who knows. (Sidenote – it’s odd to see the government grilling BP on Capitol Hill for the destruction in the Gulf after the way the government let all those people die in Katrina, isn’t it?) All I know is that I will never get those 2 and a half hours back but it was worth the dollar just knowing that all the people who love this and buy it to watch it over and over again are nuts.

Second, Everybody’s Fine.

everybodysfine

Man, oh man. This is like getting a band aid slowly peeled off. It is so predictable and so maudlin and so over the top. It should be called Everybody’s Lying or Everybody Needs Therapy. The plot : No one tells Dad what is really happening and they all ditch him for a cookout at home. Dad travels all over the country seeing the ungrateful bunch and discovers (the shock!) that he knows hardly anything about them. Dad’s too chicken to tell his own doctor that he left town and needs his prescription sent to one of the 7,500-plus Walgreens across the country so he risks his life flying without medication. In the near death experience, Dad interrogates the kid versions of his adult children at the picnic table. (Each one of those child actors are probably now in therapy) Every one comes back together after Dad nearly drops dead in the bathroom on the plane. All is well. The End.

How does stuff like this get made? Because tons and tons of people actually live like this.

I want my dollar back.

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